Notes on bumboat journey
The bumboat is suffering
Serious after-effects of sunburns
Skins of dirty-blue paint is peeling away
From the aged wood underneath
I shrug off it’s shabbiness
What does it matter?
There is quiet pleasure
To be gained afterall
In listening to the engine’s steady pulse
It’s rhythmic whirr
The bumboat cuts across
The resigned sea
For now,
The bed is serene despite mixed signals
From the brooding sullen skies.
The bumboat’s engine
Churns rolls of jade waves
And lacings of white froth trailing
Behind it’s wake, like a bride’s veil
Sweeping across shiny church floors
I lay on the hard moist deck
with ‘Great Expectations’ in my hands
Pip and Estella’s barren romance
Is an apt tale to be read
While journeying on a bumboat
That had seen better days
Serious after-effects of sunburns
Skins of dirty-blue paint is peeling away
From the aged wood underneath
I shrug off it’s shabbiness
What does it matter?
There is quiet pleasure
To be gained afterall
In listening to the engine’s steady pulse
It’s rhythmic whirr
The bumboat cuts across
The resigned sea
For now,
The bed is serene despite mixed signals
From the brooding sullen skies.
The bumboat’s engine
Churns rolls of jade waves
And lacings of white froth trailing
Behind it’s wake, like a bride’s veil
Sweeping across shiny church floors
I lay on the hard moist deck
with ‘Great Expectations’ in my hands
Pip and Estella’s barren romance
Is an apt tale to be read
While journeying on a bumboat
That had seen better days
posted by Medusa aka expiringpoet at 12:22 AM
5 Comments:
Like the Dickensian allusion. Just discovered your blog. Blogsurfing checking out fresh poetry sites
what, no pictures of the boat? :)
enjoyed your poem, friend. could be better, but am not complaining.
the last time i took a bumboat ride was many years ago, i think to P. Ubin.
hi potash,
Thanks for appreciating!
dsnake,
yeah, I'm not crazy about this one too. Hadn't been writing a word for weeks and this one had to be literally squeezed out word by painful word...scary!
I quite like this. I think it needs something more personal perhaps, it seems too quiet or something. :) Not enough of narrator's true thoughts maybe. Maybe it's just me.
- Liz
Dear Liz,
You're probably right about it being too quiet. Was in a sombre mood, that may be influenced the poem's somewhat overcast nature. Like all of my poems too, this one needs alot of whittling and enhancing. We'll see how it goes, will try to save it if I think it's worth the additional effort it'll take :)
Thanks for your comments!
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